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Stop Minimizing, Start Leading: Breaking Free from Self-Limiting Habits in Construction

November 4, 2024

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I'm the founder of Build Women, where I help women in the construction and building industries grow, lead, and succeed. With over 30 years of experience, my passion lies in empowering women through leadership training, events, and community building. Together, we’re breaking barriers and shaping the future of the industry.

i'm stefanie couch

Picture this: A residential construction project manager has just masterfully rescued a luxury home build that was severely behind schedule and over budget. Through creative problem-solving and vendor negotiations, she’s brought the project back on track, saving the company hundreds of thousands in potential losses and preserving their reputation with a high-profile client. But when presenting her accomplishments to leadership, she starts with, “I just wanted to share a few small changes we made…”

Just. Small. Few.

These self-minimizing words hit me hard because I’ve been there. We all have. As women in construction, we often unconsciously undermine our own authority and impact. Today, let’s talk about three powerful habits that might be holding you back in our industry – and more importantly, how to break free from them.

The Minimizing Trap

“I just wanted to check in…”
“I think maybe we could…”
“This might not be important, but…”

Sound familiar? I hear these phrases constantly from women in building materials and construction, regardless of their experience or expertise. This habit of minimizing – using words that diminish our presence and authority – is particularly damaging in our industry, where confidence and decisiveness are highly valued.

The Fix: Start by doing a “just” audit of your emails and presentations. Count how many times you use minimizing words like “just,” “small,” “might,” or “maybe.” Then rewrite without them. That “small update” becomes “an update that brought our luxury home project back on schedule and under budget.” That “just checking in” becomes “following up on our timeline.” Your words shape how others perceive your leadership – make them count.

The Disease to Please

Here’s a scenario I see repeatedly: A woman leader in construction takes on every request, stays late to help others with their projects, and says yes to every committee. She’s known as the “team player” who always helps out. Meanwhile, her male colleagues are focusing on high-visibility projects and strategic relationships.

In construction, where resources are often tight and deadlines are critical, this habit of overcommitting to others’ needs can derail your own career trajectory.

The Fix: Create a “strategic yes” filter. Before saying yes to any request, ask yourself:

  • Does this align with my career goals in construction?
  • Will this give me visibility with decision-makers?
  • Is this the best use of my expertise?
  • What will I have to say no to if I say yes to this?

Remember: Being helpful is good. Being known only as helpful isn’t.

The Rumination Spiral

“I should have mentioned the supply chain implications…”
“Maybe I was too direct in that meeting…”
“Did I come across as too aggressive?”

In an industry where women make up only 11% of the workforce, we often overanalyze our every move, word, and decision. This habit of ruminating – constantly reviewing past interactions and decisions – doesn’t just waste time; it erodes confidence and prevents us from taking bold action.

The Fix: Implement the “15-Minute Rule.” When a situation needs review, set a timer for 15 minutes. Use that time to:

  1. Write down what happened
  2. Identify key learnings
  3. Plan specific actions for next time
  4. Move on

After 15 minutes, the matter is closed. No more mental replays.

Breaking Free: Your Power Moves

  1. Speak with Authority
  • Replace “I think we should” with “I recommend”
  • Change “Just wanted to share” to “I’d like to present”
  • Transform “Maybe we could” into “I propose”

  1. Strategic Time Management
  • Block focused work time in your calendar
  • Create boundaries around your availability
  • Delegate tasks that don’t advance your goals
  • Prioritize high-visibility projects

  1. Build Confidence Through Action
  • Document positive feedback
  • Track your wins and impacts
  • Study successful presentations or meetings
  • Practice power poses before important meetings

  1. Create Your “Not-To-Do” List
  • Stop apologizing for having boundaries
  • Stop taking notes in meetings unless it’s your role
  • Stop doing others’ work to be “helpful”
  • Stop minimizing your achievements

The Future of Construction Needs Your Full Power

Here’s what I know for sure: The construction industry is evolving, and it desperately needs strong women leaders who own their power and influence. Every time you minimize your achievements, overcommit to others’ needs, or waste energy ruminating, you’re diluting your impact on our industry.

Ready to Step Into Your Power?

Join us at Build Women’s next leadership event, where we’ll work together to break these habits and build new ones that serve your career goals. Connect with other women who are changing the face of construction, one powerful decision at a time.

Remember: The construction industry doesn’t need you to be liked. It needs you to lead.


Join the conversation: Which of these habits resonates most with you? What strategies have you used to overcome them? Share your experiences in the comments below.

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networking

how women rise

confidence

branding

Business

ALL POSTS

explore the blog

How women Rise
Live event in vegas

the grit blueprint
podcast

You'll also love

search the post index

MORE ABOUT ME

I'm the founder of Build Women, where I help women in the construction and building industries grow, lead, and succeed. With over 30 years of experience, my passion lies in empowering women through leadership training, events, and community building. Together, we’re breaking barriers and shaping the future of the industry.

i'm stefanie couch

At Build Women, we are on a mission to empower and equip women in the building and construction industries. Our goal is simple yet powerful: to help women grow, lead, and excel both professionally and personally. We recognize that representation and support for women in our fields can be limited, and we're here to change that.

Build Women is my passion project. 

Hi, I'm stefanie couch!

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