For many women in leadership and business, perfectionism feels like a badge of honor. It’s the relentless drive to dot every “i,” cross every “t,” and deliver flawless work. On the surface, perfectionism seems like a recipe for success. But as Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith reveal in their groundbreaking book How Women Rise, this trait can often hold women back from reaching their true potential.
If you’ve ever delayed a project because it wasn’t “perfect” or hesitated to speak up in a meeting for fear of saying the wrong thing, this one’s for you. Let’s dive into why perfectionism can be more of a trap than a strength—and how to rise above it.
What is Perfectionism Really Costing You?
Perfectionism can feel like you’re striving for excellence, but there’s a key difference between the two. Excellence is about doing your best work; perfectionism is an impossible standard that can lead to paralysis, burnout, and missed opportunities.
According to How Women Rise, one of the biggest barriers to career advancement for women is the need to over-deliver or be 100% qualified before pursuing opportunities. Sound familiar? Helgesen points out that perfectionism often keeps women from:
- Delegating Tasks: The belief that “no one can do it as well as I can” leads to micromanagement and exhaustion.
- Taking Risks: Fear of making mistakes can stop you from seizing new opportunities or stepping outside your comfort zone.
- Asking for Help: Perfectionism can make you feel like you need to handle everything on your own, creating unnecessary stress.
The bottom line? Perfectionism may help you maintain high standards, but it can also prevent you from achieving greatness.
How Perfectionism Manifests in Everyday Life
Helgesen’s work highlights common ways perfectionism shows up for women, particularly in the workplace:
- Over-Preparing: Spending excessive time on presentations, reports, or emails to make them flawless—often to diminishing returns.
- Reluctance to Speak Up: Hesitating to share ideas until they’re fully formed or “perfect,” while others contribute freely.
- Fear of Delegation: Taking on more than you can handle because you don’t trust others to meet your standards.
- Avoiding Imperfection: Delaying or avoiding action altogether because the result might not be perfect.
The irony? Often, what you see as “not good enough” is more than sufficient to others.
Breaking Free from the Perfectionism Trap
The good news is that perfectionism isn’t a life sentence. With self-awareness and intentional effort, you can shift your mindset and start operating from a place of confidence and growth. Here’s how:
1. Redefine Success
Success doesn’t mean perfection—it means progress. Start celebrating the effort and learning that come with each task, even if the result isn’t flawless.
Action Tip: After completing a project, write down three things you did well and one thing you’ll improve next time. This keeps you focused on growth, not unattainable standards.
2. Embrace “Good Enough”
As Helgesen suggests, sometimes good enough is exactly what’s needed. Perfectionism often leads to overthinking, which can delay important decisions or actions.
Action Tip: Set a time limit for tasks that don’t require your absolute best effort. For example, allow yourself 20 minutes to draft an email instead of agonizing over every word.
3. Delegate Without Guilt
Helgesen emphasizes the importance of delegation as a skill for rising leaders. Trusting others to handle tasks not only lightens your load but also helps your team grow.
Action Tip: Start small. Delegate one task this week that you’d normally handle yourself. Resist the urge to micromanage—offer guidance, but let the person take ownership.
4. Take Action Before You’re “Ready”
One of the most empowering lessons in How Women Rise is that confidence often follows action, not the other way around. Waiting until you feel 100% prepared usually means waiting too long.
Action Tip: Identify one opportunity you’ve been hesitant to pursue—whether it’s applying for a new role, speaking at an event, or launching a project. Commit to taking the first step this week, even if it feels imperfect.
5. Reframe Mistakes as Learning Opportunities
Perfectionism can make you fear failure, but mistakes are an inevitable—and valuable—part of growth.
Action Tip: The next time something doesn’t go as planned, reflect on what you learned and how you’ll apply it in the future. Mistakes are stepping stones, not setbacks.
Personal Lessons from My Journey
As someone who’s spent years in leadership, I’ve wrestled with perfectionism more times than I can count. Early in my career, I felt the need to over-deliver on every project to prove my worth. I thought perfection was the only way to be taken seriously, especially in a male-dominated industry.
But over time, I realized that striving for perfection was holding me back. I was spending so much energy trying to make everything flawless that I wasn’t focusing on what really mattered—delivering value, taking risks, and building relationships.
Letting go of perfectionism didn’t mean lowering my standards. It meant recognizing that being “good enough” is often exactly what’s needed to move forward.
From Perfectionism to Progress: Final Thoughts
Perfectionism may feel like a strength, but as Sally Helgesen reveals in How Women Rise, it can be one of the biggest barriers to growth. By letting go of the need to be flawless and embracing a mindset of progress, you can free yourself to achieve more than you ever thought possible.
Remember, the goal isn’t perfection—it’s impact. Your work doesn’t have to be perfect to matter. Your voice doesn’t have to be perfect to be heard. So, step forward boldly, take risks, and trust that you’re more than enough.
What’s Your Take?
Have you struggled with perfectionism in your career? What steps have helped you move past it? Let’s continue the conversation in the comments—I’d love to hear your story!
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